fault. Think of it this way. Twice in my life I’ve been caught in a river’s mud, a quicksand-like substance. It was a scary, frustrating experience. Your first inclination is to fight and struggle, but the more you struggle, the deeper you sink. Many marital problems are like quicksand. So the more you let a couple fight against a problem, the more entrenched they become in the throes of the problem. In other words, it grows, rather than goes away. Since many couples have only a vague understanding