leaders advised you to "go, sit in your cell, and your cell will teach you everything." 2 2. You spent time with your anam cara, that is, your "soul friend"—not a superior like a spiritual director, but more like a peer with whom you were voluntarily vulnerable and accountable; to whom you made confession; from whom you received penance; who both supported and challenged you.3 3. If the monastic community was at all large, you spent time with a small group of ten or fewer people—led by someone chosen