convey a message that if my friend wanted to provide encouragement, 1 was eager and open to receiving it. The point can be summarized in a phrase: encouragers must develop the skill of listening beneath words. Words often communicate not only an open, visible message but also a subtle, hidden message. And hidden messages need to be heard. Still, an important caution is in order: not every sentence is communicating a disguised need. There is nothing less encouraging than a would-be encourager stalking