When our past pain becomes our present identity, the shame cycle has claimed yet another victim. Like a child who repeatedly picks at a scab, many hurt people live a life of unhealed pain. Finding a Way Out Please understand that there is a way out of the cycle. It is different for each person, but it is also possible for each person, by the grace of God, no matter how uniquely and irreversibly crippling that person’s shame might feel. When we let shame control our actions, we cannot know God, because