What if our definition of faith is wrong? What if we have been putting faith in our own ability to have faith? What if real faith is not necessarily absent of questions and doubt; what if real faith is more about what we do with doubt than whether we have it? I looked at Joshua a lot in those days. I watched him sleep. I watched him watch videos. I watched him bravely take his medicine and try to adjust to life in a hospital cell. And I dreamed about what might happen in the future. I thought