a vow with myself following my mother’s cruelty: I would become a good boy. These words from Alice Miller explain it perfectly: Children who fulfill their parents’ conscious or unconscious wishes are “good,” but if they ever refuse to do so or express wishes of their own that go against those of their parents, they are called egoistic and inconsiderate.… If a child brought up this way does not wish to lose his parents’ love (And what child can risk that?), he must learn very early to share, to give,