lost gifts

Miscarriage, Grief, and the God of All Comfort

Brittany Lee Allen

Lost Gifts: Miscarriage, Grief, and the God of All Comfort

Copyright 2025 Brittany Lee Allen

Lexham Press, 1313 Commercial St., Bellingham, WA 98225 LexhamPress.com

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Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are from ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Print ISBN 9781683597988

Digital ISBN 9781683597995

Library of Congress Control Number 2024950422

Lexham Editorial: Rachel Joy Welcher, Todd Hains, Erin Mangum, Mandi Newell

Cover Design: Gabriel Eason

To James,

Through your steady love, God has healed many of the broken parts in me. Thank you for choosing me and holding my hand in the fires of this life.

To the babies I never met,

It was my joy to carry you all the days of your life. See you when I get home.

Contents

Introduction

1 The Gift of a Child

Lord, Does My Baby’s Life Matter?

2 The Gift of Lament

Lord, Why Did You Take Our Baby?

3 The Gift of a Deepened Theology of Suffering

Lord, Is the Death of My Baby Good?

4 The Gift of Weakness in Light of Redemption

Lord, My Body Betrayed Me

5 The Gift of Experiencing God’s Peace

Lord, I’m Afraid of the Future

6 The Gift of Our Good Shepherd

Lord, Your Goodness and Mercy Follow Me

7 The Gift of His Word

Lord, If Your Word Was Not My Delight …

8 The Gift of Loving Your Husband through Loss

Lord, Sustain Us

9 The Gift of Growing in Grace

Lord, Their Words Left Wounds

10 The Gift of the Church

Lord, Bless the Burden Bearers

11 The Gift of Compassion and Comfort toward Others

Lord, Bring Healing from My Grief

12 The Gift of Deeper Intimacy with Christ

Lord, You Are the Treasure above All Treasures

A Note to Pastors and Church Leaders

Introduction

Walk with me behind the house

to the place

where zinnias grow.

It’s there where I first sowed

seeds of grief—

watching and waiting—

in the hand-tilled earth.

It was when they began to bloom

that I first felt death,

from within.

“There’s nothing there,” I heard myself whisper as tears gathered in my eyes. Contractions pulsed through my abdomen as the tech searched for my baby via internal ultrasound. I shook uncontrollably in a fury of anxiety and sadness as tears slid down my cheek and pooled in my ears. My friend held my hand, repeating the only words to be said at a time like this: “God loves you, Brittany. He loves you so much.”

I left the hospital that day with a heart so full of grief, there was no room left for more. But I was forced to make room, ...

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About Lost Gifts: Miscarriage, Grief, and the God of All Comfort

Grief upon grief.

I felt life perish from within my body three times. I had children, I just never got to hold them or know them or kiss them. My life looked no different from the outside. But inside, I was heartbroken and confused. Losing a baby in the womb is common, but that doesn’t make it any less painful. The grief of losing any child feels unbearComfortable.

Lost Gifts: Miscarriage, Grief, and the God of All Comfort laments the grief of miscarriage, discovers God’s gifts in spite of loss, and remembers our Good Shepherd, who weeps with those who weep. When we suffer, we are invited into deeper communion with Jesus. In the pain of miscarriage, we learn to treasure our suffering Savior who holds us.

Support Info

allengrief

Table of Contents